Answer To Unspoken Prayers
by JaydenBell
Summary: Stella realizes that her mother was with her all along, even if she couldn't be by her side to guide her.


Mama you taught me to do the right things  
So now you have to let your baby fly  
You've given me everything that I will need  
To make it through this crazy thing called life  
And I know you watch me grow up and always want what's best for me  
And I think I found the answer to your prayers

And he is good, so good  
He treats your little girl like a real man should  
He is good, so good, he makes promises he keeps  
No he's never gonna leave  
So dont you worry about me  
Dont you worry about me

Mama theres no way you'll ever lose me  
And giving me away is not goodbye  
As you watch me walk down to my future, I hope tears of joy are in your eyes

888888888

Being without parents her whole life taught her to automatically adjust to situations where parents would normally be around.

As a young kid, she had the nuns at the orphanage for a lot and was always grateful. She always had someone there for parent-teacher conferences to make sure she kept up with her work.

She had a couple foster families that did the jobs of parents too; helping her go clothes shopping, taking her to community events with her peers, a nice "mother" who guided her through puberty and her first period.

She was back in the orphanage by the time she was interested in dating. Nuns were no help with that. She flirted and snuck around with boys when she could, but mostly, strict rules made it tough.

Stella never argued. She wondered frequently how it would be if the situation were different, if she had her mother and father instead of "guardians".

By the time she reached college, she had roommates and girlfriends to teach her a lot of what a mother couldn't, but she couldn't help but think that something was missing from all of her experiences that she wouldn't be able to gain from them.

When it came time for holidays, when everybody left campus to go home and the loneliness set in hard, she learned more about family than she ever thought she would know. Friends who were in similar situations. She took an invitation into a stranger's home with a smile and never looked back. She had the first happy holiday celebration with the only "family" she had ever known.

When she joined the NYPD, she had a whole new family and formed even more relationships that she never knew could develop between people. She had a whole new faith in the word 'family'. And she realized that even if she couldn't have her own mother and father and siblings and grandparents, she could still have family.

He was family. Every second that he was around she felt something that could only be described as "family".

He was the one and only and told him every single day.

And then.

She missed her mother. The mother she never knew. She wanted to call her and tell her about the love of her life and how she couldn't wait for her to meet him. She wanted her to know how kind he was, how he stood up for what he believed in, how gentle he was. How perfect he was for her baby girl.

She cried to think that conversation, those happy tears and warm hugs would never take place. Every little girl needed that; every grown woman's heart longed for that.

She smiled as she looked over at him sleeping next to her in bed.

Sliding out of the covers slowly and carefully so as not to wake him, she got down on her knees next to the bed. The cold hardwood was shocking to her warm skin, but she didn't make a sound. She only folded her hands like she had been taught at such a young age. And prayed.

To God. To her mother. That they both knew she was happy. That she was with a man only God and a mom could send. Tears welled in her eyes, but they didn't fall. She went on and on praising God for the gift she could have never dreamed of. And speaking to her unknown mom about how she was thankful for being given life and the chance to find such an amazing man.

With another smile, she rested her head on the mattress and thanked the two who influenced and guided her through each day without her even needing to ask.

"Love, your girl," she whispered. "Amen."

Standing slowly, she slid back into bed, snuggling into him when his arms automatically reached to find her and pull her close again.

"So good," she whispered as she drifted off to sleep.


End file.
